A long-term client tells you they want to open up their relationship. Are you ready to help them?
This groundbreaking guide to consensual non-monogamy offers a reading experience that feels like consulting with a trusted advisor. Martha Kauppi equips you with the skills to be a true ally to clients who want to explore polyamory. Learn from the expert who trains experts as she debunks myths and shares the exact tools she uses with her own clients.
Flip to any chapter for an understanding of what is possible, where and why things break down, and how to help. You’ll learn how to conceptualize complicated relational dynamics in a way that leads to effective treatment, and how to identify and disrupt maladaptive relational patterns without perpetuating negative cultural bias. A must-read for anyone looking for a framework to simplify the complexities of polyamory.
Click here to see the table of contents.
Praise For My Book
Co-founder, The Couples Institute, author of In Quest of the Mythical Mate and Tell Me No Lies
"Beyond excellent! It is a rare book that so boldly advances the field. Martha provides thoughtful support for marginalized individuals while challenging unconscious biases and providing exceptional therapeutic tools for growth. Don’t miss reading this one."
Dr. Tammy Nelson
Author of The New Monogamy: Redefining Relationships After Infidelity
and Getting the Sex You Want: Shed Your Inhibitions and Reach New Heights of Passion Together
"Martha Kauppi has written the book for all therapists working with open relationships and polyamory. It is chock full of ideas for being poly or managing fluid relationship agreements, including how to have tough conversations and how to self-soothe. This author is masterful at helping people create change. These are skills that have been missing in the literature, until now. I can’t recommend this book enough."
Justin J. Lehmiller
Research fellow at the Kinsey Institute and author of the book
Tell Me What You Want: The Science of Sexual Desire and How It Can Help You Improve Your Sex Life
"Polyamory is a book that should be on every sex and relationship therapist’s shelf. It is an indispensable and comprehensive guide to not only understanding polyamorous relationships, but also providing affirmative therapy for clients with diverse relationship structures. Casual readers looking to enhance their relationship skill set can also benefit from the book’s straightforward approach and practical exercises."
Author of Is My Husband Gay, Straight or Bi?, LGBT Clients in Therapy, and Erotic Orientation
"Martha Kauppi has written a book on much more than polyamory. To be poly-informed, she skillfully teaches how one needs to understand other populations such as LGBTQIA, kink and fetish communities, and other erotic orientations. Her work is based on current research and recognizes clinicians’ need to be versed in understanding relationships focusing on differentiation. It is exhaustive and includes the nuances, complexities, and diversities that exist within the poly community. This book is destined to become a classic."
Dr. Elisabeth Sheff
Author of The Polyamorists Next Door, Stories from the Polycule,
When Someone You Love is Polyamorous and Children in Polyamorous Families
"In the tremendous new book Polyamory: A Clinical Toolkit for Therapists (and Their Clients), Martha Kauppi examines the clinical side of serving polyamorous clients in a mental healthcare setting. Using data from her own and others’ research, Kauppi provides a solid grounding in theory, explains the intersections between consensual nonmonogamy and kink/BDSM and LGBTQ+ populations, and takes on therapeutic bias and ways for therapists to look beyond CNM to other issues in the relationship. Kauppi offers clinicians tools to approach clients’ common issues such as forming agreements, managing jealousy, cheating, healing from past relationship trauma, and a mismatch in desire for CNM. Polyamory: A Clinical Toolkit for Therapists (and Their Clients) concludes with ethical and professional considerations, and a wealth of useful worksheets and handouts. The most comprehensive toolkit for therapists serving clients in consensually nonmonogamous relationships to date, Polyamory: A Clinical Toolkit for Therapists (and Their Clients) is required reading for culturally competent CNM mental health care provision."